This refers to Sister Rajshree Dange’s article, “Physical identity for Dalits” (DV Jan.16, 2005). I have some interesting points on marriage and Mangal Sutra from two books written by a noted Telugu writer, Taapi Dharma Rao.
He says during the primitive and “uncivilized stage”, people used to fear and fight each other. The victors used to take away women of the defeated. They tied a rope round their necks and dragged them. There used to be fight among men for the same women. Deaths were common. This they thought was not good for the group because their enemy would become stronger. To put an end to this infight, they evolved a system: “one woman one man”. In due course this paved the way for marriage institution and division of labor between men and women. Later they developed rapport between the groups and they started inter- group marriages. But the old practice of taking away women took a new shape of a marriage ritual. The bride’s group playing the part of the vanquished and the grooms as the victors. In that ritual, threads were tied round the neck of the bride instead of the rope and that was called Gala-sutram.
Sexual poses: To sanctify gala-sutram, they devised a metal pendant which came to be called Man-gala- sutra which later changed its shape, size and style. The male chauvinistic vaidiks imposed all sorts of restrictions on their women. In the name of chastity (only for women) and sanctity of the Mangala Sutra, women are warned not to remove it under any circumstances except on the death of their husbands. If any woman dares to do so she would go to naraka. In their view, a woman is nothing but a thing for quenching their lust. That is the reason for sculpting erotic figures of women in sexual poses.
The Hindus believe that Kumkum besides adding to women’s beauty it protects them from “evil sight”. Putting sindur in their (women) parting is in vogue in North India and today we see women of South India imitating it. Sindhur in its pure form is harmless. But it is adulterated with cheap chemical substances causing skin cancer.
Putting sindhur is a Hindu custom. When “we are not Hindu and never Hindu”, why should our women follow that practice? Dalit women should discuss with the help and guidance of progressive women like Sister Dange and decide themselves. As our dictum is to “hate what our Enemy loves and love what our Enemy hates”, our Dalit women should give up all Hindu practices including sindhur and Mangala Sutra. That itself will add to our distinct identity.
